When did Halloween go from trick or treating and candy corn to mostly-naked bumblebees and french maids barhopping downtown? A very happy male population on this day. The peer pressure started by costume companies and party store conglomerates to make it socially acceptable for girls to throw out their morals (and wardrobes) on this day is scary in itself. Sometimes, the fun is taken out of the holiday with all the stress revolving around the pumpkinriffic.
If you are like me, and can get easily stressed thinking about what to wear or where to go on this annual holiday, I hope to make it easier for you for offering some quick tips on making the most of your Halloween festivities.
1. To dress up or not dress up? Although some parties make it mandatory to dress up, despite popular belief, it’s not a rule (at most places) for entry. Don’t freak out if you waited til the last minute and the stores are all out of your hair spray paint supply. Either stick some fangs in to shut people up, or don’t worry about it. Warning though, it will be a conversation-starter if you are wanting more attention on Halloween. So if you are an attention-phobe, I’d get out those trusty backup fangs.
2. Ignore the political banter – try your best not to spank the inevitable Sarah Palins shashaying around. Unless it’s your significant other. And then, let’s try to NOT do that out in public. 
3. Use your strengths! If you look exactly like Ozzy anyway, go for it! Unfortunately, if you look like him, it will be your one moment to shine in life anything. If you don’t have a resemblance to anyone in particular, a unique costume (the more creative the better) is always key to turning heads. Especially home made outfits! One year I spent more money on my own Rainbow Brite costume that it would have cost to buy the plastic dress at a store. No regrets though, no regrets — had a great time, took some great pics, and won bragging rights fair and square from the “plastic Rainbow B ” that was at the same party.
4. Lead, follow, or get the hell outta the way. (When this isn’t on one of those cheesey office lobby cat-hanging-from-tree posters, this is actually an awesome quote.) If you took it upon yourself to throw a blow out or get together, good for you! If not, then do yourself a favor and go where your friends and favorite people are. Example: this year, everyone seems to be going to a certain Downtown area that we manage to carefully avoid many other nights of the year. However, if that is where the majority of your pals are headed, do yourself a favor and get over it. You will be much happier in the company of friends (even on a grungy stool with stale popcorn and horrible parking) then at a random friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend party where you will receiving picture messages of what Minnie Mouse just did to the fountain, etc. all night. It’s hard to get to know new people when they are in masks or naughty doctor gear. Stick with the golden oldies on this one – just make sure you have a designated driver, not just someone dressed as one.
5. Stay away from a ridiculous amount of “halloween drinks” – as enticing as a licorice bomb or candied corn shot might sound the night before, your tummy will thank you in the morning if you stick with what you know.
6. Don’t ever underestimate the importance of a backup bag – backup bra for girls, and a place to swap out the crazy shoes/wig/ [insert apparel you would only wear only Halloween here] when it’s getting in the way of social activities.
7. Fetch the “schtick”: If all else fails, and your party sucks, or Downtown is awful, suck it up and embrace your “schtik” – Google Halloween costume contests around town to see if you can get some of your costume money back by putting on one hell of a presentation. The dive-y the bar, the better!
Have fun! And I want to know what everyone is being…most creative costume, etc.!
Play the music, not the instrument. ~Author Unknown
